Moving North of Vag

I wish I could take credit for this statement but I sadly can not claim that. In fact the person who turned me on to the statement cannot even take credit for it. His name is Jim Wendler and he actually got the term from his friend. I don't want to reprint parts of his book since enough people pirate his hard work but suffice it to say the concept of Moving North of Vag is to stop being a pussy and man up.

First I want to take a small step back. There is nothing wrong with vag. I would also like to say that I have seen far more women who endure terrible hardships and preserve than I have men. Most men fold at the first sign of struggle. When the going gets rough they get going out the door.

So while this may not be EXACTLY what the Jim Wendler (yes that is correct, Jim Wendler is no longer a man but an entity) or his friend meant I take the statement North of Vag as manning up. Whether you are a woman or man you can man up. What does man-up mean? If you have to ask that it means you have not manned up. In fact you should just stop reading this blog altogether and go back to you're mommy's tit because you might start crying.

You cannot get in shape without getting stronger. Sorry but no one will convince me otherwise. In order to get in to real optimum shape you have to get outside of your comfort box. Don't listen to any half ass personal trainer or bullshit diet pill infomercial that tells you they have some secret method to getting in shape. They are worse than drug dealers. Hell drug dealers are at least honest and as a bonus get you high as fuck. On the other hand 99% of personal trainers, bullshit university studies, miracle supplements, and other shit they peddle will make you worse not better. It gives you a false sense of expectations and once you fail to see results you will surely throw your hands up in the air and give up. I know because I had been through that more than a few times. Empty promises and no results.

Here is what they will never say to you, to get the results you want it will take very hard work and it will take a while. Whether you want to be a powerlifter, athlete, or just "in-shape" it will be a marathon and not a sprint. Slow consistent day in and day out adherence to a training and nutrition plan. You have to push yourself beyond what is comfortable and you must deny yourself cheap fixes.

"But but but... Ms. Smith lost a ton of weight after going to some shady doctor and getting an adipex (or insert another diet drug)." That's nice. Really I am impressed.

Wait for it...

Wait for it....

Okay now fast forward a year from now and Ms. Smith is fatter than fuck. But it really does work right? Get the fuck out of here with that kind of menial bullshit. Hell even when she was "skinny" dare her to take her shirt off and you will find the ugly truth she went from being fat to "skinny-fat". An illusion of the weak. Hell look at these lap band fucks and you will never see someone in good shape, they might be smaller but look horrid.

All they ever needed was a little manning-up. Want to know the secret to manning up?

1. Warm up/Stretch
2. Lift Weights
3. Hill Sprints/Sled Dragging/Tabata drills
4. Fast paced walking

Yes that is it. Lift 4 days a week focusing on heavy compound lifts each day (ie- Sunday- Squat, Monday- Overhead Press, Wednesday- Deadlift, Friday- Bench Press). That is just a rough guideline but those lifts have been the key to people getting stronger and fitter for generations. I obviously don't train in this fashion but I do use those key lifts as the cornerstone of what I do and quite frankly you don't want to do what I do. It would eat you up and spit you out so don't even entertain notions of doing what I do. Keep your training to 30-45 minutes, get in and do your lifts and get out. The 2 hour marathon training sessions Missy and I do are killers and really not ideal for most people. We are actually working on shortening the length but a good portion of that time is spent coaching her since she is new to this.

Number 3 might be a bit confusing but rather than list what exactly to do my whole point was that you should perform some type of higher intensity cardio. Not often but three times a week would suffice. Should take 20 minutes or less. Missy and I do sprints while dragging a weighted sled behind us. 6 sprints at 60 yards. Might not sound like much but try and it and if you are still alive tell me how it went.

Number 4 might sound like a south of vag item but let me tell you that a 30-40 minute fast pace walk at least 4 and up to everyday a week. If you do nothing else but this I guarantee you will feel a hundred times better and enjoy life more. The key is to walk quickly and not just a leisurely stroll. I hate to quote a number but aim for at least a pace of just before you start to jog. And no you don't have to do that funky power walk walk, just walk with a fast pace and enjoy the health benefits. It will keep blood flowing and your heart will thank you.

Next article will contain a no non-sense guide to nutrition and a big fuck you to diet guru's who I consider one step above rapists.